Sunday, 11 January 2015


One of the unforeseen disadvantages of moving to Algeria is that I have seen less of the country than I did when I came here on holiday.  Somehow, the settling down process has taken every ounce of our strength and every minute of our time, and when we do get a chance to go and explore we have no money…or we have the money but work and school and University and exams all get in the way.

So when my husband suggested a fool-proof means of visiting and staying in Oran I jumped at the chance.  He had a friend (don’t they all?) whose wife was from there and her in-laws had an empty flat beside their own one and we could stay there, just a short distance outside Oran.  My eldest son, allergic to the idea of travelling that distance with his siblings and parents in the confined space of a car, decided he had more interesting things to do like catching up on his sleep and hanging out with his friends.  The two girls took some persuasion, but after explaining that no, we were not going to stay with strangers, we were going to stay beside them, and we would have a chance to explore Oran, they decided to be adventurous and come with us.  The two youngest boys needed no persuasion – a road trip to Oran?  Yipee!

When I asked my husband to ask the brother what we needed to pack in the way of kitchen or bedding equipment I was told not to bother, and so I clamped down the tiny voice of doubt in my mind by reminding myself we were only going for 2 days…what could go wrong?
A unique way of growing trees!

The day came and we were packed and ready for just after lunch time as we were to follow the brother who was going to travel down with us in a separate car to collect his wife and children who had been staying there on holiday.  So we waited for his call to say he was ready, and we waited, and we waited. We prayed Asr prayer, and when it came to Maghrib the girls and I decided we were no longer going to go because it was just too rude to land in on a family of complete strangers at midnight or maybe even later.  My husband who had been out all day returned home to a mutiny with us women unpacking and planning a nice quiet weekend without him or the boys.  When he told the brother, HE rang back and said, honestly it was no problem…we were all welcome and we must come.  After quite a bit of back and forth phone calls and heated discussions between us women and my husband, my husband informed me that the brother’s family absolutely insisted that we come.  I knew my husband really wanted me to go with him so I relented, purely to please him, but I really wasn’t happy about arriving in a strange house with  strange people in the middle of the night. The girls really didn’t want to go at this stage and I persuaded my husband to let them stay behind.  When all the children realised that I was going without either of the girls each of their reaction, from all five of them and my husband, was ‘how are you going to manage?  You can’t speak the language. How are you going to communicate with your hostesses?  You need at least one of the girls with you!’  I told them all that I was a bit on the old side to need babysitting and if this family absolutely insisted on me coming….then THEY could put up with the consequences….ME!
The Basilica of Santa Cruz

As we set off at 8’0 Clock at night I sat in the car and prayed to Allah ‘You know this is such a daft thing to do…it’s rude and I’m sorry but it’s not up to me.  I really don’t want to do this but I’m doing it purely for Your Sake.  Just help me get through it.’  My husband was full of the joys of spring on the journey down and Allah answered my dua and I managed to be civil to him the whole way!
Inside the Basilica of  Santa Cruz
We arrived in at midnight and my husband and second youngest son disappeared off into a room, and I was ushered into another room with my youngest son.  The brother’s wife and her sister both greeted me and then brought in a complete meal…chorba, main meal, bread, salad…the works.  I barely touched anything as it was late and I was tired….and extremely embarrassed.  They wanted to know where the girls were and I told them that they had stayed behind because it was too late…and was greeted with puzzled stares.  Anyway, somehow, I got through the next hour and they showed me to the bathroom and when I returned they had made a bed up for me on the canopy.  So much for staying in the flat next door!  They had made another bed for my son, and then there was a third bed made up on the floor where the hostess settled down for the night, and I realised that this was out of courtesy to me.  When I came to Algeria on holiday once, without my husband, I went and stayed with his brother and his wife and when it came to night time, for the first few nights she insisted on sleeping in the same room as me.  I found it all very odd but it was Algeria and peculiarity and abnormality was part and parcel of my observations here so I never remarked on it.  It wasn’t until sometime later, either on a forum or Facebook that someone made a similar comment and I discovered that  this was considered to be part of a hostess’s duty in ensuring the comfort of her guests, because it was considered discourteous to leave them sleep on their own in a strange house!
Inside the Basilica of Santa Cruz
The next morning I tried to communicate with my hostess and I remember so well, as she made way for me to go to the bathroom she muttered to herself ‘ma famt waloou’ (I don’t understand anything), and I burst out laughing.  She looked behind at me and when she realised that I had understood her she also started laughing and from there on in everything was fine.

I met her married daughter, her parents and we all had breakfast and then my husband, the boys and I went to look around Oran.  It was winter and the day was quite foggy so the pictures I took were not all that brilliant, but we had a good look around and bought a take-away, before returning to the house for the evening meal at our host’s insistence.

My youngest son had deserted me in favour of a much younger playmate and I was left to fend for myself, communication wise.  By the time I left the next morning, somehow,  I had managed to learn the whole family history and we had all become good friends.  That’s the thing about being Irish….we never let a little thing like a language barrier get in the way of a good story...... or getting all the 'sca' (Irish slang for gossip).

I think we caught him on a bad day!


  1. salamu aleykum,

    dear sister Evelyn, i'm happy that i found your blog, now i know where to read if ever i get depressed here in Algeria, you are soo funny to read Allah barek!

    have a nice day
    um-zakaria (we "know" each other from muslimah4algeria)

  2. Walaykum asalaam wa rahmatulah Um-Zakaria......yes I remember you well from the forum and I'm so glad you're enjoying my blog. To be honest I think it's difficult to survive here without a sense of's either cry or laugh sometimes!